pmfsl bmt m8 that was funny
I just bought a new car stereo... When you shout out "Soul", it plays soul music. When you shout out "Rock", it plays rock music. Some kids ran in front of my car, and I shouted "fucking kids!", and it played Michael Jackson.
Two old football fans.
Joe and Alf were both 90 and they had known each other since they were bairns.
Both were fanatical football fans.
Sadly, Joe gets ill and on his deathbed he says to his mate "Alf, you have been such a good mate to me I wish I could repay you in some way"
Alf says "well when you pass on you can let me know if there is a heaven and if there is, is there football there?"
OK says Joe, I'll do me best and he sadly dies that night.
A couple of nights later Alf is woken up in the middle of the night by a bright flash of light and a ghostly voice says "Alf it's me Joe"
"But you're dead"
"Yes I am speaking from heaven and I have good and bad news"
Alf says fantastic ! so there is a heaven.
Yes answers Joe, "and there is football here as well, I am young again and we can play all day without ever getting tired, its always spring and never cold or rainy."
"So whats the bad news then ?"
"You're in the team a week on Tuesday..."